Envy

I learned many things growing up from family and friends, but one thing I must have learned myself is never to envy anyone.

Early in life, I learned to pray for what I wanted and growing up, I realised I should work in addition to my prayers; as the holy book says in James 2:14, "Faith without work is dead." I know it helped me a lot. Rather than envy, I always complimented what I liked in a person. This made me happy and made them even happier. I compliment and congratulate people on attributes and successes, respectively.

I always thought it was stupid and probably evil to envy someone. Why would you envy your schoolmates because of what they have attained or are attaining? You don't know what and how they are doing it or the sleepless nights they are having; I mean, you just don't know. All you know is that you have to buckle up and do your thing, so rather than generate so much negative energy by envying, you should channel that energy to working hard, being positive and living thankfully. A valid point would be that you don't know who their parents are, their opportunities, or whatever it is. Your path ain't their path; never forget this; therefore, walk in your path truthfully. 

Or that colleague at work who gets raises and promotions, every appraisal period; do you know how hard they work or how many asses they kiss or how many emails they send asking and begging for undue appraisal. Sweetheart, please take a chill pill and work truly hard when it's your time to get a raise. You would, maybe, even be out of that office to a better senior role. I mean, who knows?

Don't you dare envy those married folks? They are praying as hard as they are working for their relationship to succeed, which will be done by God's grace. If you are ready for sacrifices, sharing, giving and going all the nine, then at the cost, you are prepared to get married. I will tell you again and again, don't rush into it because sis B and bro Z are always posting awesome pictures on the gram or because of the way Mr K carries his wife's bag on Sunday morning. There are more things the pictures do not tell and more things the lovely videos do not reveal. They are praying harder than that public affection you see displayed. Marriage is sometimes sacrificing, loving, praying, communicating, leading, supporting and a lot more in between. So don't be too quick to envy them if you ain't ready to go all the way and make the sacrifice. 

On career advancement, don't be envious and angry that all your classmates have a master's degree and you don't. Just hold on to it, dear. You will get accepted to the best school there is, and you will live that dream. Just don't get envious; it ruins you psychologically and physiologically, even deeper within.

Ohh! That boss that talks as though the heavens lie on his shoulder don't hate or wish you were them; you are better than that. Let them ride in their high horse and work hard so you are a better boss to your subordinates than they are to you now in the near future. Be the boss everyone wants to work with, the awesome boss who criticises in private and praises in public, and be the boss other bosses wish they could be. That sounds like they might envy you, but you get my point *be the awesome boss*.

Writing this reminds me of a post I saw online sometime this week. It read as this: 'Envy is the last class before witchcraft' or something like that. It seemed more like a joke than a quote, but when I reread it and let it sink, I realised those words were not far from the truth. Have you seen what envy can do or has done? It has destroyed homes; it is terrible. Envy creeps in slowly from the moment mum/dad/aunt/uncle begins to compare and assume their child should be better than a niece or nephew or the child down the road. Have you seen how bad envy has destroyed friendships and families? That was more than a post to laugh about. It was deep, and the message sank even deeper.

If you forget anything else, remember this: 'Be the boss, friend, colleague, wife, husband, sister, brother, cousin, mother, or father that you dreamed you had. Be the one to be emulated, not envied. Be the dream person you always looked up to. Be the sum of the great men.

When the thought of comparison that eventually leads to envy is about to set in, look back and thank God. Just look back at all He has done and be grateful for all He has done. It could be hard, but it's worth it. It helps you reflect and see how much God has done in the past. This way, you are grateful, and it makes you realise that if He did it before, He will surely do it again.

This bible verses can help; they helped me, and they still help me.
1.  Prov 14:30. A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones
2.  Prov 27:4. Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy/envy?
3.  Phil 2:3. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourself 
4.  Psalm 37: 1. Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; 2. For like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. 3. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
5.  James 3: 14. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. 15. Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. 16. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice

Have a beautiful Friday and an awesome weekend. 

Originally published on 7/28/2018 at 2:07 AM.